Perhaps it was foolish of her, but she couldn’t help but think that he felt it too. The spark between them, the reluctance to pull away... she believed that he felt that same pull. Regardless, she let him go. Even if every instinct commanded her to only hold him close.
As she sank back down into the bed, it was with a flush and satisfied smile. She pressed her fingers to her lips, still tingling from their fervent kisses. Her eyes stayed fixed on him as he moved away, barely able to blink yet alone look away. Not until he disappeared from sight entirely.
She waited until he slipped out the window to fall back flat in the bed with a giggle. If she closed her eyes, she could still feel him - every one of his kisses, his touches.She hoped that memory would never fade, that she could forever close her eyes and remember the way he’d felt against her. The way he’d made her feel. Perhaps that would be enough to sustain her.
With dawn nearly here, she knew she wouldn’t have the luxury of much sleep today. Yet she closed her eyes, knowing those few moments would be worth it. In her dreams she could see Hashe again. Pretend he’d never left. With that in mind, she quickly drifted off to sleep.
Later, she’d find a package left on her windowsill. A small reminder that made her smile, even as it brought her relief. She could never regret what they had shared, but she wasn’t looking to have children of her own. Not when she wasn’t even finished raising her siblings yet. She had no real hopes of finding a life of her own, even once Calantha was grown. That didn’t mean she was rushing to start the whole process over again.
Her eyes lifted to the red scarf that hung still in her window, knowing she’d never remove it until she was sure he was long gone. She’d never risk losing the chance of another night with him - another moment even. All she could do is pray that he would return to her again.
Someday.
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